I don’t look back on my life so far with any regrets, but sometimes with a pensive attitude, thinking and picturing a couple of events, decisions, happenings and choices I just may have made differently. Like taking a left instead of a right. Some of them…well, I still have time. And I just may…
IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER:
25. Always wondered what it would have been like to go to UCLA. Have no idea why, so I didn’t even apply. Loved my school in Virginia, but I played it safe.
24. Should have done theater. I love to perform. I would have been pretty good, I think!!
23. One time in high school, this boy, who was a free spirit, a drummer in a band, and not my usual “type”, asked me to jump in his Trans Am with him and drive South for the weekend. No plans. I chickened out. I’m still sure I made the right decision, but there’s just that little part of me that wonders….
22. I should have walked more at the beach when I lived there. Always felt like I needed to run, bust my ass on a workout. I saw the sun and water, but did I ever really feel and smell them?
21. Eat the cake. I should have eaten the cake. Always counting calories and the impending repercussions. I’m sure it tasted good.
20. I often wish I would have taken that proverbial year off to “find myself”. Travel. Live out of a backpack. Meet various people of different cultures and languages. Maybe with a friend, maybe not. One year off between school and the real world would have done me wonders.
19. Speaking of friends, I wish I would have been a better one. Best friend material. I never really had the really good, tell-her-everything type. No besties. It suited me mostly, but many times I craved it.
18. The vintage Levi’s with the bling in the store in NYC. They were so expensive…overpriced, but I do so regret not buying them. I think of them often and wish they were in my closet.
17. I probably should not have spent so much money on shoes in my life. Nah….forget that one. I love each and every pair. If you feel chunky or soft, just the right shoe makes you right.
16. Cars. I traded in way too fast and too many times. Stupid. Waste of money. Now I drive the same one for 12 years. I have evolved.
15. My wedding. I paid for the entire thing myself. I don’t regret the “Bone-In Chicken” choice, but I do regret the grand total. I’d get married small in a Catholic Church now and have a destination party somewhere else. If you wanna come….great. If not, oh well.
14. My boyfriend from college in Virginia followed me down to Florida after graduation. I should have told him I wanted to end it before he packed up everything and made the move. That was mean. We broke up 2 nights after he arrived in the Sunshine State.
13. Bedtime shouldn’t have been such a psychotic issue with me as a mother of my kids. But I guess it created order, so there’s that. But it also may have created some angst. A “Forest Through The Trees” issue.
12. I ran my first of 24 marathons at age 40 after having my sixth child.I did pretty well. I wonder how I would have done if I had started earlier?
11. Fitness has always been my passion. I often dreamed of owning my own studio/gym. I would have been good at that. They’re everywhere now.
10. My first-world-career passion was to be a TV reporter. I honestly should have tried way harder to follow through on that. I was on fire with the idea. But I wasn’t willing to pay the price of the low rung on the ladder in pay. I went for the money in sales. I made it, but I hated it with that same fiery passion. Money changes everything.
9. Speaking of work, being a mother has been the best, most rewarding path/career I could ever dream of. But, at this juncture, I’m beginning to think I should have kept my foot in the door somewhere. Trying to break back in is tedious and knocks a girl down a few notches. Self-esteem somewhat intact but taking a beating.
8. I should have gone to Moscow when my sister lived there. Big regret. Rome, too, with the family. Staying home with four young ones at Christmas time while the other three went has never been fully appreciated as a sacrifice.
7. I’ve been everywhere between a Size 2 and a 10. I look back and think “Who the hell really cares?” I wish I didn’t that much.
6. I should have told my coach in high school who dropped me like a hot potato when I was injured and couldn’t win him his accolades anymore that his opinion didn’t mean squat to me. I didn’t….I cried instead. But today would be waaaaaaaay different. I’d let him have it.
5. I never stay up late because I’m too worried about how I’ll feel the next morning. Fear of being non-productive. But I saw Jimmy Fallon the other night and I laughed out loud. Felt so good. What is wrong with me? I love to laugh!!
4. My kids don’t really know my nieces and nephews on my side of the family. Big, huge regret. Makes me sad.
3. Have to admit, sometimes I wish I was a little…softer. In speaking, in body language….just all around a little more gentile. Funny thing is, I’ve tried to be. But it feels phony. I’m working on a happy middle ground.
2. One thing I have no qualms over is the amount of pictures I have taken, especially as a mother. I only regret the pictures I didn’t take.
1. Have you ever been driving and think “I wonder what if would feel like if I just kept driving and ended up….wherever…even for just a couple of days?” You know, take the left when you should have taken a right? I do. Because I’ll always come back.
jensumandthensome 