Month: August 2017

There’s a surefire killer out there…and it’s called “Self-Doubt”.

We all seem to define ourselves by all parameters which surround us on a daily basis. It is hard not to, and it seems to be getting harder every day. There are lines in the sand drawn everywhere.

“Am I good enough?” “Will I make the team?” ” Will I be accepted?” “Will they extend me a bid?” “Why her, and why not me?”

All seem to be every day questions and angst-ridden feelings to ponder. And it’s a shame only if we let it overtake us.

Now, we’ve all heard lately of the tuff-lovers who believe we should throw away all “Participant” trophies and the “Thanks for trying your best” notes, followed up by the “It’s not just about winning” speeches. While I agree there is some truth and savviness to this way of thinking, I believe also it can have an adverse effect.

Kids and young adults haven’t been out there long enough to flick off with the wave of a hand a rejection. The rawness of it hits like a brick the first few times. And there we are…the more “seasoned” of the rejectees informing them “Too bad, kid. That’s life. Deal with it”, barely remembering the many and perhaps countless

times it may have happened to our very selves on our own righteous path to life. “God, I’m tough. I’m woman. Hear me roar. Badass with a capital B”.

But is that wise?

I would rather encourage somebody who was turned away. I’d love to tell the sweet girl who I’ve known most of her life that the sorority which tuned her away must have had a reason unknown to the surface, like sheer numbers, or urgings from the higher-ups to fill the room with a certain number of like someones to even the score of the supposed biases some may think of the group…that it isn’t that she wasn’t “good enough”, but instead on the precipice and that it doesn’t matter because there was one more worthy of her.

I’d tell the kid that made with jubilance the team, yet never set one foot on the field that his day will come, because the coach saw something in him to pick him, place him and coach him in the first place. Learning life skills along the way, which by FAR extend way more than 100 yards in the Game of Life.

For all the kids who tried out and were cut…to realize what an opportunity that is to dig deep into your ever multi-faceted and talented self and try things you never in the world thought for a second you would even be remotely interested. What a valuable time frame to do it when you can!! Almost like a gift!!!

To never be defined by anyone other than yourself.

Self-doubt is the handmaiden of the devil. It works and spirals through our very beings,seeping into the bloodstream and making its way into our hearts. We have the strength to knock it down to size, spit it out and stomp on it.

I define me.