I can assure you, the younger set, many things don't change. So, my advice, for what it's worth…is to gather all the confidence you can in yourself,not only for the present time you are living and experiencing, but also for the future. Be your own champion, know and realize deeply that you do in fact have much to share and contribute, and that you are more than intrinsically valued.
You are important. You make a difference.
Life is so full of comparisons, from early on and through the days of our lives. It is inevitable, and it is actually a good thing, and can be quite beneficial. You must have a gold standard to which to aspire, to emulate, yet not imitate. Be the golden you, for sure, and notice that which you choose not to become. There's nothing wrong with that at all. Hopefully, from an early age on, your parents and mentors can help with this notion.
The murky area is when the comparison becomes one-sided, when there are those who may try and make you feel not quite up to snuff, or on the same level or playing field. And they are out there. Maybe not bad people, per se, just…well, perhaps best defined as arrogant. You know the type…the ones who think the room should quiet to a hush, or a least a gasping lull when their presence is known. (Insert eye roll here…).
I've been to many gatherings in my life. And though I do not consider myself air-headed nor vacant, I am often unaware of just exactly with whom I share the room. Honestly. I've never been one for knowing the "Who's Who" in a situation. All I know is if I am enjoying myself in conversation. And if I am, it shows…with laughter, amazement, surprise, introspection and free-flowing dialogue. And if not, well, I'm outta there.
The first sign of someone I don't want to engage with further is if they, even one time, look over my shoulder mid-convo. Deal-breaker. Ice-smasher. Convo-ENDER. I've even gone so far as to change the line and subject of our little chat to see if it gets a notice. One pause and then a re-locator from the respondent with that special look in the eyes, then I give it my smirk and simply walk away, not even giving one hoot who that person even was.
Recently, I was having a delightful, full of emoticons conversation with a really nice lady, who was dressed in an outfit I adored. We discovered we had much in common, as was evidenced by shared experience in our lives, usually including our kids' activities, and so the conversation flowed easily, back and forth, and with no effort. I enjoyed my time with her at the cocktail party, which I knew from the invitation included the aforementioned "Who's Who of Cincinnati", but I still hadn't a clue who was who. After a while, we both seamlessly moved on, with natural ease , either to get a drink or peruse the room and appetizers. I, in turn, found myself speaking with one of the young men who was there serving the crowd for the event. Can't remember why, but we started talking sports and who his favorite players were, and who he followed on Twitter, and how I am a runner and still love to to do marathons and triathlons, but how my injury prevents this to the effort I would like. You know, general, interesting small talk.
A little later, a friend of mine who was also at the soirée asked me about the conversation with the woman I described above. I relayed to her the extent of the easy, breezy engagement, and she said "You know who that was, right?"
And , no, I did not. As far as I knew, it was just a nice lady in a really pretty purplish top. But I know now her identity. And I still remember her awesome purple top.
Won't tell you the name here, because it's really not important.
But the fact that somebody thought it was is. And there is really nothing wrong with that. I've been star-struck a time or two in my life as well.
But I can honestly tell you this:
If someone, a celebrity, an actor, a sports figure, the President, Bill Gates or the Editor-in-Chief of Vogue Magazine walked in, I would never ask for an autograph.
But would I would ask for is a selfie with them, camera in hand.
Because, you see, I'm just as important as they are. I'll send them a copy.
jensumandthensome 