Month: May 2017

You think you know someone, but , seriously, is it even possible to know everything before you're blindsided and it may be just a little too late to rethink the sitch…

So, in hindsight, maybe I should have told him this, you know, full disclosure of a "A Few Things You May Need to Know About Me", just in case it was a deal breaker.  

I'll limit it to 10, and not necessarily in order of importance:

10.  I will ignore all sentences, commands, phrases and questions which begin with "Just out of curiosity", because it usually ends with something behind it which is sarcastic and I'm usually not in the mood for that.

9.   I like a certain temperature in the house.  Not too hot, not too cold.  Call me Goldilocks.  I like to save money and wear a sweatshirt in the house in the Winter, or wear a tank top in the summer.  Come on.  A compromise is best.  Quit changing the thermostat.  Everybody knows it damn well costs more when you shock it.

8.   I'm not a late-nighter.  I like the early mornings.  I make no apologies here.  It's never going to change.

7.   I am Santa.  Grew up with a generous Santa.  I am carrying on the tradition.  Ho, ho, ho-freaking ho.

6.   Showers.  Baths.  I save so much with my temperate climate in the house, I am entitled to a little excessive water usage for cleansing and relaxing.  Usually 3 times per day. And along with that will ALWAYS be several different fragrances, bubbly concoctions and lotions from which to choose.  They will be adorning the walls of the shower and the tiles of the tub.  Call it my oasis.

5.   Yes.  I do have a tad of OCD.  But let's not forget the times it has possibly saved our lives or kept us from being robbed:  Before going to bed, I check all appliances to make sure they are off (I've noticed the grill has been left on), I check all doors to ascertain they are locked, and I complete the checklist with the garage, which I have on more than MANY occasions found to be wide open from the last person who entered the house.  Um, yeah.  To think what could have happened if I wasn't a 10-minute-per-night whack job.

4.   I like to shower with the lights off and the window shades completely open.  In the dead of winter, I love a scalding hot bath, with the window open, especially if it is snowing, so I can feel and see the outdoors as if I'm in a hot tub outside in the middle of a mountaintop at a resort in Colorado.  Please don't walk in and turn on the lights,

3.  I am sometimes not good at backing out of the driveway, especially with multiple vehicles on it. Expect the grass to have tire marks and muddy gulches frequently.  Sorry. It is what it is.

2.  When provoked, I've never been one to simper.  I give it like I get it.  I don't necessarily have to have the "last word", but I'm no shrinking violet. Never have been.

1.  I'd rather laugh than cry.  Sometimes they're interchangeable.

So, there it is. I don't like to think of it as "well, it's too late now", but rather "God I love that woman.  She is so multi-faceted and makes life interesting."

And by the way, there's 10 more where that came from.  😜 

I can assure you, the younger set, many things don't change.  So, my advice, for what it's worth…is to gather all the confidence you can in yourself,not only for the present time you are living and experiencing, but also for the future.  Be your own champion, know and realize deeply that you do in fact have much to share and contribute, and that you are more than intrinsically valued.

You are important.  You make a difference.

Life is so full of comparisons, from early on and through the days of our lives.  It is inevitable, and it is actually a good thing, and can be quite beneficial.  You must have a gold standard to which to aspire, to emulate, yet not imitate.  Be the golden you, for sure, and notice that which you choose not to become.  There's nothing wrong with that at all.  Hopefully, from an early age on, your parents and mentors can help with this notion.

The murky area is when the comparison becomes one-sided, when there are those who may try and make you feel not quite up to snuff, or on the same level or playing field. And they are out there.  Maybe not bad people, per se, just…well, perhaps best defined as arrogant.  You know the type…the ones who think the room should quiet to a hush, or a least a gasping lull when their presence is known.  (Insert eye roll here…).

I've been to many gatherings in my life.  And though I do not consider myself air-headed nor vacant, I am often unaware of  just exactly with whom I share the room.  Honestly.  I've never been one for knowing the "Who's Who" in a situation.  All I know is if I am enjoying myself in conversation.  And if I am, it shows…with laughter, amazement, surprise, introspection and free-flowing dialogue.  And if not, well, I'm outta there.

The first sign of someone I don't want to engage with further is if they, even one time, look over my shoulder mid-convo.  Deal-breaker. Ice-smasher. Convo-ENDER.  I've even gone so far as to change the line and subject of our little chat to see if it gets a notice.  One pause and then a re-locator from the respondent with that special look in the eyes, then I give it my smirk and simply walk away, not even giving one hoot who that person even was.

Recently, I was having a delightful, full of emoticons conversation with a really nice lady, who was dressed in an outfit I adored.  We discovered we had much in common, as was evidenced by shared experience in our lives, usually including our kids' activities, and so the conversation flowed easily, back and forth, and with no effort.  I enjoyed my time with her at the cocktail party, which I knew from the invitation included the aforementioned "Who's Who of Cincinnati", but I still hadn't a clue who was who.  After a while, we both seamlessly moved on, with natural ease , either to get a drink or peruse the room and appetizers.  I, in turn, found myself speaking with one of the young men who was there serving the crowd for the event.  Can't remember why, but we started talking sports and who his favorite players were, and who he followed on Twitter, and how I am a runner and still love to to do marathons and triathlons, but how my injury prevents this to the effort I would like.  You know, general, interesting small talk.

A little later, a friend of mine who was also at the soirée asked me about the conversation with the woman I described above.  I relayed to her the extent of the easy, breezy engagement, and she said "You know who that was, right?"

And , no, I did not.  As far as I knew, it was just a nice lady in a really pretty purplish top.  But I know now her identity.  And I still remember her awesome purple top.

Won't tell you the name here, because it's really not important.  

But the fact that somebody thought it was is.  And there is really nothing wrong with that.  I've been star-struck a time or two in my life as well.

But I can honestly tell you this:

If someone, a celebrity, an actor, a sports figure, the President, Bill Gates or the Editor-in-Chief of Vogue Magazine walked in, I would never ask for an autograph.

But would I would ask for is a selfie with them, camera in hand.

Because, you see, I'm just as important as they are. I'll send them a copy.

Things sure have changed from when I was young.  

I honeslty don’t remember even experiencing one quarter of the issues the youth of today has now.  Some major examples include bullying, peanut allergies, self image issues, and feeling totally left out of any fun social activities which may have been going on.  Wow.  I had it good.

I remember as a very young kid just wanting to ride my bike and play in the woods, climbing trees with my best friends, and playing dolls in hiding.  (That’s a whole other blog….lol).  I also remember the trouble we got into by being hellyuns by throwing raw eggs on the electrical boxes outside to see if they would sizzle.  If I remember correctly, they kinda did.  

Innocuous enough stuff.

As I got older, I pretty much did the same stuff, just with a bigger bike and no eggs.  Instead, we used to put real estate signs in peoples’ yards after collecting them from all the neighborhoods in the middle of the night.  We also used to stand in groups on opposite sides of the street, pulling on an imaginary rope when cars came by so they would slow down.  Unhook Christmas lights and wait for the homeowner to come out and yell as we scampered off in our dark clothes.

Punk stuff.  But…still….kid stuff.

When I got to high school, it sure was a huge transition for me.  My dad had just died, and we moved to a whole new city and school for me and my sister.  My older sister had already moved on in college, and then lived in a neighboring city.  Now that was hard, ain’t gonna lie.  I had to start from scratch, as I had done so many times previously in my life as we travelled the globe with Dad being in the military.

But this was different. It was High School.

It was then I started noticing just how pretty other girls were, and how cute the boys who liked them were. And when a couple of those boys showed inklings of maybe just a little bit of liking me back, well…it was just a whole new feeling. Fun. Exciting.  And sometimes heartbreaking.

But that was it.  

It was in the school hallways, or at the football games, or parties at friends’ houses when you noticed.  It was not 100% of all of the time right there at the fingertips to see what you were missing out on, or how cute Sylvia looked in those Levi 501 blues, with her long, lean legs and awesome long dark hair.  Bronwyn was so cute, and I always thought that in French class.  I heard her one day talking about a party she had gone to…one which I had not and wondered why…and then when class ended, well, that was it.  I couldn’t stalk the latest Snap to find out who was there, if it was fun, who looked cute, and what everybody was wearing.  When French was over, so were the thoughts of the party I didn’t attend.

Don’t get me wrong…I’m as connected as the next guy or gal.  In fact, once I finish this blog, well….there it goes…up “there” somewhere.  And I’ll probably post it to Facebook, because I would like to share my thoughts with. my friends…so I would be a hypocrite (which, in my opinion is the worst kind of people) if I denied the prowess and power of social media.  I use it, peruse it and love it.

But sometimes it comes with a price tag.  

We still have bikes.  And there are still places to hang.  In person, talking, communicating and giggling.  

And sometimes, ignorance truly is bliss.